My Nerves are Shot

I e-filed my copyright forms and e-submitted Smuggler’s Justice through http://www.copyright.gov/eco and I submitted it to a publisher. So, yeah, my nerves are completely shot. I didn’t do the logical thing and submit to a publisher who generally publishes science fiction, oh no, I took a leap and submitted to a publisher that might be interested in the underlying social commentary. I figured that if they actually read the slush pile (hey, no guarantees there, I know they’ve got mountains to go through, I’m not kidding myself, just hopeful!) then someone might decide they really, really like political intrigue and government cover-ups, even if it is in a science-fiction setting. I particularly think that could be the case if you take the longer view of the series as a whole dealing with lots of different aspects of governmental corruption and the kind of places that slippery slopes can lead.  That said – it’s going to be ‘8 –  12 weeks’ before they get back to me; if  they get back to me at all.

So, while my nerves are seriously shot and I’m trying not to actually shake, I’m not going to hold my breath and I’m very likely to simultaneously submit to other publishers who are more likely to actually want science fiction… lots of gadgetry, FTL travel, odd civilizations, thinly disguised social / political commentary and all. Who knows? Maybe the first folks I contacted will jump on it and be completely thrilled about it, maybe they’ll turn me down, but the point is that this time I didn’t chicken out. This time I actually submitted my manuscript somewhere, and for me that makes all the difference.

I still haven’t decided which agent, if any, to query. I admit that having an agent might be helpful in getting the books sold, but I’m really not sure how well I’d “work” with an agent. Do you remember grades from early elementary school: S for Satisfactory, N for Needs Improvement, and U for Unsatisfactory? I do. I also remember getting a U in ‘works and plays well with others’ every semester for years. You wouldn’t think so now, since I’ve managed to get along quite well with any number of people I’ve worked with, but I do worry that tendency might crop up in working with an agent. I don’t really know why that worry is lurking in the back of my mind. I’m sure agents are perfectly reasonable human beings. Maybe it’s worrying that I’m not an entirely reasonable human being!

That said, I also was a ‘good girl’ and I finished the first round of edits on Wendy S. Russo’s January Black today. In re-reading it, I have to say that it’s still awesome and I still had to blow my nose and clean my glasses (tears tend to leave mineral traces when they dry) and boo-hoo a bit. I sincerely love the way Ms. Russo works to bring the concepts of liberty and freedom into her work…. And of course, I do love me a governmental cover-up, a conspiracy, and a lot of research to uncover them. The characters are endearing and I love that Matty tries so hard to be a gentleman. I think it’s a much more realistic depiction of what goes on in a boy’s mind when he’s a ‘good kid’ at heart than you generally see in YA fiction. I also love that he’s a brat! Okay, okay, no spoilers even though I would absolutely love to rave on and on.

On the home front, my little boy had to stay home from school today because he had one really long seizure and four little ‘after shock’ seizures that wiped him out. Poor lamb wound up sleeping until nearly noon. My big boy has a job interview tomorrow and, yes, I’m really hoping that he gets the job. It would give him something to do besides mope around telling me that there aren’t any jobs not getting snatched up by mid-career grownups who need work to pay the bills. I still think it’s sad that he got upstaged for a job at McD’s by an accountant.